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The opposite of an energy drink Zero caffeine. Zero hustle.
Sloth De-Energy This Could've Been an Email White Peach and Citrus can
Sloth De-Energy Let's NOT Circle Back Blackberry Lemonade can
Sloth De-Energy Hey, You're On Mute Black Cherry and Vanilla can
Quick one — can you get this to me by EOD?4:58 PM · High importance
Nudge: 4 close contacts are in the office today
@channel gentle reminder about the reminder
12:07PM Lunch moved to 12:07–12:22
Are you still working?? 😭
The host has started the meeting Join
RE: RE: RE: RE: Circling back
PR #482 needs your review ●
CHG0098421 P1 CAB approval required
Can we double-click on that? 42 / 87
@you mentioned in “Weekend Coverage”
Friendly bumping this to the top of your inbox
YOUR PASSWORD EXPIRES TOMORROW. AGAIN.
4:30PM Alignment on our alignment strategy
pls tell me you’re not joining another call
Flavor firstActually craveable fruit profiles
Built forPost-meeting decompression
Two modesDaytime chill + nighttime wind-down
Buy it as6-pack, 12-pack or retail singles
Three ways to care less

Pick your de-energy.

Three flavors, two modes: bright daytime de-energy and a smoother nighttime wind-down.

Sloth De-Energy This Could've Been an Email White Peach and Citrus can
Daytime De-Energy Drink

This Could've Been an Email

White Peach + Citrus

Bright, crisp and juicy. For meetings that should have been six words in Slack.

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Sloth De-Energy Let's NOT Circle Back Blackberry Lemonade can
Daytime De-Energy Drink

Let's NOT Circle Back

Blackberry Lemonade

Tart berry and sharp lemonade for when there's nothing left to circle back on.

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Sloth De-Energy Hey, You're On Mute Black Cherry and Vanilla can
Nighttime De-Energy Drink

Hey, You're On Mute

Black Cherry + Vanilla

Smooth, rich and evening-coded. Permission to mute the day and go quiet.

View product →
Model wearing the black Slow Down With Our Bad Chemicals premium hoodie Featured hoodie Slow Down With Our Bad ChemicalsPremium unisex hoodie · $58 Model wearing the black De-Energize Your Expectations premium hoodie Original design De-Energize Your ExpectationsPremium unisex hoodie · $58 Model wearing the black No Need to Crush It Today premium hoodie Original design No Need to Crush It TodayPremium unisex hoodie · $58 Model wearing the black Your Calendar Is Not a Personality premium hoodie Original design Your Calendar Is Not a PersonalityPremium unisex hoodie · $58 Model wearing the black Let’s Take This Offline premium hoodie Original design Let’s Take This OfflinePremium unisex hoodie · $58
Sloth De-Energy Apparel

Premium comfort. Original Sloth.

Our original designs are now available on premium black tees and hoodies in men’s/unisex and women’s fits.

Shop the collectionView featured hoodie
Sloth De-Energy illustration about slowing down after work
Why Sloth exists
Busy culture needed an opposite.Not another product asking you to optimize harder. A brand built around exhale, clarity and not boiling the ocean.
What we make
Calm does the work. Flavor gets the credit.Magnesium, L-theanine and calming botanicals slow the day down; white peach, blackberry and black cherry make sure you enjoy it.
Who it’s for
Corporate survivors, calm seekers, normal people.The commute home. The post-meeting reset. The quiet hour before bed. The part of life after being “on”.
Our extremely serious mission

The world has enough products telling you to do more.

Do less.
Beautifully.

Sloth De-Energy is for the commute home, the post-meeting exhale, the quiet hour before bed, and every moment where productivity can respectfully go bother somebody else.

Log offNotice moreRush less
The Sloth operating systemVersion: emotionally available
01Rest is not a reward.You do not have to earn an evening by destroying the afternoon.
02Your life is not a dashboard.A walk can just be a walk. Dinner does not need a KPI. Hobbies are allowed to stay unmonetized.
03Ambition needs an off switch.Care about your work. Do excellent things. Then be unavailable on purpose.
The Sloth BreakroomTalk about work without using your LinkedIn voice.Pseudonymous workplace conversations, questionable meetings, useful advice and zero thought leadership.
What makes a De-Energy drink?

Function without the wellness lecture.

Energy drinks wind you up and leave you there. We built the opposite — a cold can that quietly takes the edge off the afternoon and hands your evening back. Three moving parts, zero hustle.

The de- part

Zero caffeine

No jitters, no 3 p.m. escalation spiral, no lying awake at 1 a.m. renegotiating with the ceiling. Finally, a drink that lets your nervous system clock out.

The easy part

Flavor first

No grassy supplement aftertaste. No herbal bathwater. Just crisp, cold, actually-craveable fruit — the calm rides in disguised as something delicious.

The bad chemicals

Functional backbone

Magnesium, L-theanine and calming botanicals riding shotgun under the flavor — gently taking the edge off while zero caffeine keeps you pointed at the couch, not the ceiling.

Meet the bad chemicals

Build a mixed case

Build your mixed case.

Build a 12-can mix one can at a time. Every tap updates the case and the price.

Mix your ideal level of not caring.

Combine daytime and nighttime flavors into one gloriously unmotivated case. Each tap adds one can at about $2.17; a full 12-can mixed case is $25.99.

Sloth De-Energy This Could've Been an Email White Peach and Citrus can This Could've Been an Email Peach + citrus reset
Sloth De-Energy Let's NOT Circle Back Blackberry Lemonade can Let's NOT Circle Back Berry lemonade, no follow-up
Sloth De-Energy Hey, You're On Mute Black Cherry and Vanilla can Hey, You're On Mute Cherry vanilla, on mute

Current mixed case

0 / 12 cans
Nothing selected yetChoose flavors to build your mixed case.
0
Estimated total$0.00
0% HUSTLE INBOX, BUT NICE NO 6 A.M. EMAILS
Join the Slow List

Be first to de-energize.

Product drops, store openings, mildly sarcastic updates. No 6 a.m. motivational emails.

Sloth sightings

Find a Sloth.

Current Sloth pins are live in Texas, New York, and Boston. Search a ZIP to see whether one of those markets is yours.

Texas · New York · Boston. Three places currently taking it slightly easier.
TexasNew YorkBostonMore naps nationally
Current Sloth sightingsTexas · New York · Boston
Slow reads

Content for people who are done optimizing.

Anti-hustle4 min read

Your life is not a dashboard

You do not need a KPI for reading a book, taking a walk, eating dinner, or staring at the ceiling.

Read slowly →
Work4 min read

The meeting ends. You are allowed to end too.

Why the transition between work and the rest of your life deserves to exist.

Read slowly →
Living3 min read

The radical act of having nowhere to be

Unscheduled time is not a scheduling failure. On the quiet luxury of an empty calendar.

Read slowly →

See all Slow Reads